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Get a Perfect Purr: pakeha works every time!

Posted by te2ataria on April 24, 2009

sent by a reader

First read background story: The ‘Eskimo’ Debate

Suggestions for pakeha, a new brand of suppository, aimed at the Asian markets and the advertising campaign to promote it!

Suffering from incurable constipation?

Insert a pakeha in your rear, and purr to freedom!

or

Suffering from chronic constipation?

Purr to freedom! Insert a pakeha in your rear and let him do the work!

suppository-casting-mould

It works every time. GUARANTEED! Get your free samples from a pharmacy near you!

The first 100 applicants also get a framed picture of Sir Ed with Helen Clark together with the taped  instructions of how to insert pakeha in their rear, recorded in the original kiwi accent by a famous NZ TV presenter.

dr-clark-and-sir-ed
Sir Ed and Dr Clark! Individual photos used for the frame may be subject to copyright!

[If the suppository doesn’t work, listening to the instruction taped in pakeha accent, while you sit staring at photos of Sir Ed and Dr Clark is GUARANTEED to make you go!]

pakeha is available in many different strengths [see individual labels]

  • PM / Minister range
  • High Court / District Court Judges series
  • Police Minister/ Police Commissioner [Large sizes. Not recommended for children or teens.]
  • NZ Ambassador deluxe
  • Army Officer [Try our ANZAC special!]
  • SIS Toilet Spy [for mild constipation only]
  • Police Farce [Available in 3 fragrances.]
  • UNDP formula [Helen Clark nostalgia]
  • Fake Heroes [Sir Ed is our best seller in this range. Suitable for boy-racers and bike-riders.]
  • HRC [Try our limited series Commissioner!]
  • Clergy [For people who don’t believe in miracle cures!]
  • Farmer [The frigging farmer-polluter series gives you an instant feeling of eruption! ]
  • Rugby Player Special  [French customers swear by its effectiveness!]
  • TV personalities/ TV presenters own [Includes a strong sedative.]
  • Russell Crowe Delight! [Russell Crowe Delight! This is a suppository with an attitude! ]

Hurry! Hurry! Get your free sample today before supplies run out!

[Note this blog defines the term pakeha as the foreign land thieves who illegally occupy ‘New Zealand.’ This term is not racist because pakeha is not a race.]

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Posted in asian campaign, asian markets, effective suppository, insert a pakeha, rice-eating countries | Tagged: , , , , | 2 Comments »