Swine Flu Paralyzes New Zealand

sent by a reader

New Zealand Flu Paralyzes the Swines

WELCOME to all of you foreign visitors who are visiting New Zealand this winter. We can’t guarantee you a warm welcome because too many of our intellectually challenged staff are down with New Zealand flu. However we can guarantee you a bout of nasty New Zealand flu to last you throughout your stay here and beyond.

Thank you. Thank you. THANK YOU for sharing our New Zealand flu viral mutations.

“New Zealand’s swine flu tally rose to 386 yesterday, though health officials say the real number is likely to be in the [tens of ] thousands, as regional authorities have stopped routine testing.” The Dominion Post Said.

Absence rates at Wellington region schools this week:

• Bishop Viard College 45 per cent

• Hutt Valley High School 30 per cent

• Upper Hutt College 30 per cent

• St Bernard’s College 28 per cent

• Wainuiomata High School 26 per cent

• Naenae College 26 per cent

• Samuel Marsden Collegiate School (Whitby) 23 per cent [Source: Dominion Post ]

Come to New Zealand. Sample our New Zealand flu viral mutations. Try one, or a combo, for yourself. The more the merrier.

P.s.

Don’t fly our flag-carrier because other disasters could beat the swine flu virus!

Related Links:

• Headlines from poxyland [New Zealand]
• Best News of the Day: NZ Tourism Down 50%
• US Scientist Forced to Backtrack on Swine Flu Origin
• Was Dr Wong’s Murder H1N1 Related?
• Two US Tourists Forcefully Quarantined in New Zealand
• Swine Flu Mystery and Air New Zealand
• TB cases, Swine flu in poxy New Zealand
• A (H1N1) Virus
• Airlines

• Tamiflu sales 74 times higher than usual

Question of the Week: NZ Bankruptcy

concept sent by a reader in Cambridge [Re-written by TEAA]

New Zealand WILL Go Broke Sooner or Later

Bad karma, the kiwi antisocial gene, conspiracy against nature, moral depravity, attack on the environment, incompetence, lack of professinalism, drought … are driving  New Zealand to the edge of bankruptcy. 

The question is WHEN?

Answer:

A. Second half of 2009

B. First half of 2010

C. Second half of 2010